I could not find the right words to describe what I’m going through right now…
Para kaseng it’s a very complicated situation…
Or I am the one who’s making it complicated?
Seriously, alam mo yung feeling na you know what you should do, but you can’t do what you are supposed to do… or you don’t want to do what you are supposed to do…
Parang hindi ko na alam kung sino papakinggan ko sa kanila. I respect them, I listen to their advices, and I appreciate what they’re doing for me. Kaya lang, with this situation, it is between me and the Lord talaga. If there is someone na kelangan ko kausapin, that is the Lord.
And I don’t want to base my standards and decisions on other people.
I’ve learned to lay down all these things to God.
I was talking to God the other night, and I was relieved from all these confusions and fears.
It was really hard at first…
As what I’ve posted in my friendster shoutout- “I know that I have to choose wisely, if this means that I have to go through the pain of denial, I’ll accept it”.
Pain of Denial na nga lang siguro rather than greater Pain of Consequence dba?
Pero I’m doing this not because of Christianity or faith issue.
My way of thinking is a lot different from other believers when it comes to relationship…
Really…
I’m not the one to judge other person’s character or belief just because we’re not attending the same kind of church, etc.
I’ve met so many people (pre-believers) who really have this “heart” for God. Who’s really longing for God’s love. I would say that they are a lot better compared to the other Christians that I know… even better than me pa nga eh…
I don’t buy those “excuses” or “reasons” na you will hurt someone, or turn him/her down, by saying na “I can’t love you, because unbeliever ka…”
Please…
May kilala nga ako, na nung time lang yon sya naging Christian, but grabe! Nakita talaga ang pagbabago sa buhay nya…
Don’t get me wrong, I would still advice to “guard your heart”, pero tama na ang paghusga at discrimination…
Hindi rin tama na kung sinu-sino na lang dyan...
Choose wisely nga eh...
Character is very important...
I don’t know what would be your reactions to this blog, but okay lang. I still have Ate Mai and Ms. Chlea, who are really wise and mature enough to attest to what I’m saying. J
Anyway, opinion namin ito and paniniwala…
Now, back to what I’m saying…
I’m doing this, kase I know I’m not yet ready…
There are still so many issues in my life na gusto kong maayos muna…
My relationship with God… ministry… career…
Loving him will just make things more complicated…
So ngayon. I’ve decided na magkanya-kanya muna kami ng buhay.
he can do what he wants, and I will do what I want.
he’s not mine… God wants him… God owns him…
Hindi ako dapat maki-alam sa gusto ng Lord sa buhay niya at sa buhay ko…
Hahayaan ko si Lord… Napakaganda ng plano niya sa buhay namin…
And hindi ito dapat masira dahil lamang sa nararamdaman namin sa ngayon…
I’ve decided to start a New Chapter in my life…
Sobrang ang daming nagbago…
And I would say na “stronger” ako ngayon…
And I would let God write my next love story…
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